Happy Little Homemaker

Even though I am now the breadwinner of our household (thankfully that is only temporary), I still feel the need to do all the wifely tasks around the house. Matthew has been amazing and I've come home to dishes done, dinner ready, and carpets vacuumed. He had been doing the laundry until I accumulated enough clothes that need special care that I told him I preferred to do that myself. Overall, I find joy in keeping a clean home for my family. Now, does that mean my home is spotless? Absolutely not! The majority of the time it is actually quite filthy. But that doesn't mean I can't try!

So Daddy was gone to Richmond to go to MEPS (Military Entrance Processing Station) to update his records and swear in. Mommy was privileged enough to work from home yesterday and today so she didn't have to stress about finding a sitter. Mommy did her work during the day and Jackson was such a trooper. He played with his toys and watched Mommy work. He's generally pretty content if he can see you and know you're in the room with him.

In the evenings Mommy was able to sweep the floors, clean the kitchen- dishes, counters, floors, do the laundry- to be put away when Daddy gets home, and put away all the messes that had accumulated around the house. Doesn't sound like much, but it takes longer when you have an infant! Now the house looks and smells so much cleaner. It's so nice having a clean house. It will make welcoming Daddy home feel much better. Don't want to welcome him home to our pigsty!

And I spoke too soon. Baby is fussing unless he's being held. So good night and keep a clean house!

Household purchases

You know you have reached adulthood when you are excited about household purchases. No, not decor or even furniture; but rather appliances or hardware.

Behold, the newest addition to the Iveson household. The Kenmore Intuition 31810 Upright Bagged Vacuum. We were able to snag this baby on sale for $100 less than normal retail. Matt and I know nothing about vacuums, but he knew he wanted an upright (even though I've heard canister is the way to go) with attachments for corners and stairs. I looked for something that said it worked well with pet dander and hair. We chose two that were around the same price and the sales rep said this one was the better vacuum and would probably more than cover our current needs.

Matt used it for the first time the other day and said he actually giggled. He has been disgusted at our dirty carpets for quite awhile and this vacuum did such a great job capturing all the dirt, cat hair, and everything else that has accumulated. I have yet to use it, but I'm sure I'll like it too. It's a bit heavy, but we needed something more heavy duty.

We used to have this rinky-dinky vacuum that was a gift for our wedding. I had registered for it as our old apartment had all hard wood floors (so nice!) so we didn't need anything too fancy. That vacuum did well at that apartment and has done ok at our townhouse. It has lasted the first four years of our marriage, but it was time for an upgrade. Especially with Jack playing on the floor (and someday all too soon crawling around on the floor!) and all we wanted to be sure it was nice and clean. A nice feature on the Kenmore vacuum, on the base there's a portion that says "dirty/clean" and it lights up dirty until that portion of the carpet is clean. It senses the dirt. So convenient- and keeps us from being lazy and only surface cleaning.

So yes, we are a couple hundred dollars poorer... but this will certainly be a worthwhile investment. If it lasts us the next four years of our marriage then I'll consider it money well spent. By that time we should be able to afford a much nicer vacuum that makes our home look brand new after each use!

Hard lessons

I have learned some things today. Some important, others not so much.

1) Having a working garbage disposal and sink drain makes a world of difference in completing household chores. We probably should've had both replaced when we moved in... but two years later we finally put in a work order and now have a much nicer looking, smelling, and disposing kitchen sink.

2) A cup of coffee in the morning can do wonders. One cup is all that is needed to power through emails, reconcile charges, track down lost documents, and skip an after work nap to spend time with your baby.

3) Proper parenthood begins with a strong, healthy marriage.

4) My priorities should be God, husband, Jackson... not in a very, very different order.

5) Feeling entitled doesn't help you get your way if the other person doesn't agree.

6) Pointing your finger at the other party (literally or figuratively) never solves anything.

7) I am truly selfish, bitter, and resentful when I lie to myself and others and say I am not.



So basically, I need an attitude check. I need to focus on areas I can improve myself and not on areas I feel others can improve themselves in. If I focus on being worshipful of my Savior, respectful and helpful to my husband, and nurturing to my son... everything else will fall into place. That last sentence sounds like simplistic, wishful thinking. But so many of my "problems" stem from my hardened heart, my misplaced priorities, and my personal goals/desires for myself- not for my entire family.

No, I do not have serious marriage issues. At all. But, my marriage is not where it should be to optimally function. Matthew and I still have what I consider to be a high-functioning marriage comparatively to the rest of modern society. But... what standard of comparison is that, really? It all comes down to a heart issue. I know my heart. I know my heart is not where it needs to be. How can I expect to be a good parent when I can't continue to nurture the relationship with my parenting partner?

So, the more serious lessons from that list will be carefully evaluated and put into practice as needed.

Becca, stop it. Becca, stop it. Repeat.

4 Years

Just like everyone always says, I can't believe it's already been 4 years since we've been married! But... I also can't believe it's only been 4 years! It seems like Matthew and I have been together forever. We are the perfect complement for each other. 

I feel like we have a very healthy marriage. We are truly the other's best friend. We don't have secrets from each other (that I know of anyways). While we do argue, I don't remember the last time we had an important or large argument. We apologize, forgive, and try to forget quickly. We have many similar interests and are learning to try to appreciate the interests we do not share (or at least tolerate). We would much rather have an evening together than an evening with anyone else. We share similar views on life, love, religion, and politics (most of the time). We were raised in similar structures and have the same view of parenting- which makes the hard decisions for Jack that much easier to make. We both pray for God's guidance in our lives and thusfar have been extremely blessed.

I had the day off for our anniversary, which was extremely nice. We slept in (as much as we could with Jack), had a nice casual lunch at home, and headed out to Roanoke. Our first stop was Gander Mountain.

We had discussed our "anniversary allowance" prior to this trip so we had a nice little budget for our spending. Matt had his anniversary and Father's Day allotment to spend. After a lot of browsing (Jack and I browsed the entire store while Daddy looked in the firearm section) we left with a new Nalgene for me (a nice green 32 oz-er since my current one was only a 16 oz-er), some carry ammunition, some kind of snake cleaning thing for his handguns, a magazine pouch, and a NorthFace backpack for Matt. When we got to the register we discovered he had spent his entire allowance for both events! But he's a happy camper. The backpack will be used for when he goes hiking (to train for the Army), to carry everyday stuff he needs (like to the gym), and as a more manly diaper bag for when he has Jack.

We then headed over to the mall to browse. Jack was such a trooper! He was perfectly content in the Moby the entire time we were in Gander Mountain and the mall.

I didn't find anything I needed at the mall, but it was fun to browse. We got Jack an outfit from Baby Gap for his dedication. He has a lot of clothes from Baby Gap, but nothing "dressy" in his current size (but a lot of "church" clothes in the next size! I didn't plan that well). So we found his a nice button up shirt and some olive green pants. He'll look so handsome!

I ended up using my allowance to buy an amazing leather purse and three tops from J. Crew. Spoiled! I checked online and the purse was over $200 less than the actual retail price! I'll miss the Clearance store here in Lynchburg when we move away! Two of the tops I bought are these adorable Tee's that have this lace design on the front. I got one in white and navy... and my MIL and SIL both have the white one! We do have similar fashion taste most of the time.

We stopped home quickly to freshen up and then headed to Milanos for dinner. This is one of our favorite restaurants in Lynchburg, it's not super expensive, and it's right down the street from our house!  A week and a half ago I had said I wanted to go there for our anniversary so I could have the Italian Lemon Cream Cake. It is A-mazing.

Jack was such a good boy while we ate. He fussed a little but we gave him some snuggles and then he went back in his carseat. The waitresses and people sitting around us all loved him!

He grabbed his gummy keys on his own and put them in his mouth! He's learning so much! He was chewing on the hard top of the keys instead of the soft, gummy bottom... but that's ok. He was content and that's all that matters!

I had considered asking one of my friends if they would watch him while we went out to dinner, but neither Matt nor I were ready to be away from him yet! He is our little booger and we love him. We love spending time with him and he is a normal part of our lives. I don't know if we'll even need time away from him in his entire first year!

Here we are four years later. I actually think we've started to look older. Matt definitely looks older. I am thankful to be back in my normal clothes again. It's so nice to be able to take advantage of my full wardrobe!

This is one of my anniversary presents. A 14K gold monogrammed necklace. I had been wanting a monogrammed necklace since we got married but all the ones I kept finding were too large for my liking. This one was the perfect size! It was listed as only allowing one initial but I asked and was able to get a full monogram without even an extra charge! You never know until you ask! I love it. Definitely a new favorite. The chain is the perfect length too. (and I just noticed that my hair makes my neck look super contorted! strange)

The past four years have been the best and most fulfilling of my life. Marriage has given me so much opportunity to grow and learn. Being a spouse is so humbling. I am called to be a servant-helper to my husband and neither of those things comes naturally to me. Rising to those positions in our marriage has helped me be the woman God wants me to be. It has helped me learn to be a more patient and loving individual. It has helped me develop a servant's heart towards others that are not my husband. It has taught me to appreciate Matt and the man he is.

I am so thankful for the past 4 years and am so excited for this next year. We are learning each and every day something new about parenthood and if things work out with the Army we'll learn a lot more about the difficulties of marriage I'm sure.

Mr. Mom

Matt and I have joked about the possibility that he will be "Mr. Mom" once Jackson comes. On the one hand, he will most definitely NOT be Mr. Mom. He will be Mr. Dad: homemaker. There is only one mommy in this house and it is me. On the other hand, it would be extremely hard for me to return to full time work if he was able to stay home with the baby. On the third hand (wink), if I go back to work then him being able to stay home with the baby is a lot better than a nanny or daycare center.

He will continue to look for a new job, of course, but if he can't find something that will completely cover our monthly expenses then we may decide to live on my paycheck and he stay home. Or if we find out good news about the Army and when he might go to Basic, then it might be better for me to return to work if it wouldn't be a long wait. No point in him starting a new job if he just has to leave it a few months later. So many options. I have been so grateful for the attitude God has given me recently. I did have one breakdown about all the unknowns... but for the most part I have been on board with the possibilities for our future. I have learned to trust God. After all, He has continued to bless us throughout the first 3.5 years of marriage. Why not now?

For now, Matthew has proved to be a very responsible and caring homemaker. He has really stepped up and done a lot of household chores, run errands for me, and even surprises me with dinner preparations. He mopped all our floors the other day and made a delicious steak dinner with sides and everything. This was after my last work trip before the baby arrives and I was very exhausted and kind of in a bad mood. I come home and what a great surprise!

Even when I am home, he does the dishes and laundry and gets upset when he hears me working on those things. He says it is now his responsibility and I need to rest. Seriously, amazing husband!

I feel like we are almost "ready" for the baby to come. A few more minor things to do in the nursery, cleaning the bathrooms nice and good, and making sure I have all the insurance forms I need. This weekend I plan to get everything in order and then we'll be ready for whenever Mr. Jackson decides it's time to be born!

It is so nice having Matt home with me. I love being able to spend time with him. It's also nice to be able to text him throughout the day if I forgot to do something or need something from the store. He has been so patient and loving and willing to do anything I need.

I am truly blessed. I saw a quote the other day on Facebook that was along the lines of "Marry a man you would want your son to become." That is so true and I have certainly done just that!

Exceptional Weekend

Even though it started out kind of rough, this weekend has been exceptional. Without going into too many details, we are now a one income family. Hopefully this won't last long and it actually isn't even that stressful... yet. Surprisingly enough, Matt and I have been at peace about everything and just looking forward to the next step in our journey. I am once again reminded of my focal verse for this year:

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. Do not quench the Spirit.

1 Thess. 5:16-19

While right now we are uncertain about our immediate future paths, we rest assured that God is in complete control and knows what's best for our lives. Living in confidence in Him is... very reassuring, to say the least. Thankfully, Matt and I have not been living outside of our means, are able to live comfortably on one income, and have enough in savings to give us some wiggle room when needed. Again, we still hope that this situation will be quickly remedied.

So, despite the rather rough start to the weekend... we were able to spend Friday night together, which we hadn't planned since Matt was originally scheduled to work that evening. He was also scheduled to work Saturday and Sunday mornings so I looked at it as extra time with my husband! We watched a movie, got some essentials from the store, and had a lovely evening in together.

Saturday morning I had a super fun shower with some of my Lynchburg friends. Unfortunately, the shower invites were returned in the mail twice... so many could not make it on such short notice. It was still so much fun to celebrate with my friends who could be there. The theme was "Once Upon a Time" and some of the decor included Jack's Magic Beans, a Wishing Well for wishes for me on stressful days post baby, and some old children's books. We played Baby Jeopardy (my team won!), Baby Scattergories, made onesies and burp clothes by designing bits of fabric- ironing them to the onesie or burp cloth- and the hostess will sew around the edges to keep them together (adorable!), and then opened presents. We also began with brunch, which was delicious! I am so blessed to have friends who know me so well. We got some items we still needed for Jackson, which is also a blessing. Pictures to come with this weeks preggo post.

After the shower Matt and I went to the gym. I have found that not only does it make me feel better about all the baby weight I've gained (which is actually not that much... but feels like a lot), but also it helps my legs and hips to loosen up. We then ran some errands and went to dinner at Panera with a gift card from Gma Lolo.

Today we went to church and were blessed by Pastor Nathan as usual. That is one thing I am not looking forward to once we enter the military- having to find new churches with each new assignment. I really enjoy Heritage Baptist, the preaching, and the heart of the church. We have been blessed to attend there the past 3.5 years. Came home, had some more good eats, took a nap, then did some organizing of the guest room and nursery. I was supposed to go to a baby shower for a friend this evening but I was so exhausted. I knew she would understand and I'll give her the present at work this week. I was able to get so much done in both rooms! I am so excited for the finished products. Thank you, nesting instinct! I haven't felt the need to wash everything yet... but I do have the organization bug! I have finally put away all of Jack's clothes... it's even worse than I thought! I'll have to keep track of what he wears to be sure we get at least one good wear out of all his outfits before he outgrows them!

It has been a very productive and relaxing weekend. I encourage you all to rest in the peace of the Lord in all situations. Normally I am a stressed person. I have been working on this and apparently I have gotten better. I have also been trying to grow in my active faith in the Lord. As I said before, it is very reassuring to live in the knowledge that God is in control.

Finances

One thing that comes with baby: review of the finances! A couple months ago I went through our monthly expenditures to try to see what our current budget was. Yes, for the past 3.5 years of marriage Matthew and I have not lived on a set budget. We knew what monthly bills we had and we knew how much excess there was. We never spent more than what we had so it seemed a good system. We were able to put away some savings for the future and all was well.

With a baby on the way, that system doesn't seem to be the best. So I made a list of our expenses. We immediately cut out some non-essentials so we could use those funds on baby gear or to add to savings for once baby arrives. This included getting rid of Xbox Live, one of the RPGs Matt plays on his computer, and magazines for me. I also started cooking more at home so we would have plenty of leftovers and we limited our "date nights" which used to be every week or sometimes multiple times in a week!

Christmas was the exception where we went out of our budget... but that happens every year. After that I began to stress a little about finances once baby comes. I was not planning on coming back to work after the baby but I might go back to my current job, find a new job where I could work from home or take baby with me, or transition to a new position in the same department I am currently in. So many options to help out my family financially.

Anyways, we have been much more careful with our finances in 2012. We had a major blessing when we received our lease renewal paperwork and saw that our rent cost is lowering by $60 for the next year! We figure we'll renew for one year. If Matt is selected for the Army then his training will last around the year timeframe at least so Jackson and I will remain in Lynchburg. We also thought we needed medication for our cat, but she has stopped urinating outside the litter box so that problem may be solved! We determined to only have one date night a month except in special circumstances (ie, my graduation, when Matt hears he is accepted into the Army, etc). I thought this would be difficult since we were used to eating out whenever we both were home at the same time. Amazingly, we have been able to keep to one date night a month! Yes, it's only been 2 months so far... but it has been so enjoyable to cook and make new meals for us. Preparation for mommyhood!

I have honestly been so impressed with both Matt and I and our willingness to sacrifice our wants for the baby. It seems minor, getting rid of Xbox live and magazines, but to us that was part of our lives before! We'll probably resubscribe to all of that once we get settled into a new routine with life and finances after baby... but for now we want to play it safe.

This morning Matt wanted me to come over to his computer as I was getting ready for work. I expected him to show me something "cool" in the game he was playing. I am not a morning person so I rudely told him no and continued what I was doing. A little later he came over to me and said he had canceled his game and deleted all of his characters so he wouldn't be tempted to renew the game. He received a free 7 day subscription so had been playing on that. This was one of his favorites games and he has played it for several years. It requires a monthly subscription. He wanted me to click "enter" to cancel his character with the most playtime and status. He knows the money could be better used elsewhere and he knows he will most likely want to spend time with Jackson instead of the computer once he arrives. This is one of the reasons why I love my husband.

Having a child will certainly our lives. Much more than we anticipate, I'm sure. But we will be in a new phase and have new adventures and new desires. I can hardly wait to see the changes in our family. We both love Jackson so much already. It will difficult not to completely spoil him once he gets here. At least we can spoil him with all our time and love!

Come What May

Just some reasons why I love my husband.
On the top of the picture is the description of the event.
Below the picture is a more recent story.

Matthew at Grandma and Grandpa's (he says at least) being a stinker pants.

Sometimes I'll find him sneaking around the house. He's tip toeing and trying not to make any noise at all. Sometimes I figure out why he's being so stealthy. Other times I'm not sure. Either way, it's adorable.

Matthew has a little owie. Look at that poochy lip!

When I leave for work in the morning I kiss him goodbye. He is normally still sleeping. We both say "I love you" but he sleeps with a pillow over his head. Every once in awhile he doesn't hear me say "I love you" but I always do. When he does not hear it, as I walk towards the door to leave his head pops up and he says with a concerned voice, "Love you?". I reassure him that I do love him and that I said it before. I love that he makes sure that I love him.

This is in February 2004. We were just friends at this point. But... at this retreat I told one of my friends that I thought I was growing a crush on him!

I have some definite physical flaws that truly truly bother me. Matthew reassures me that he doesn't care, that I am beautiful, and that he loves me. Our friendship grew before any romantic feelings. That is why our relationship is so solid.

This is on our chorale tour in London. We both developed crushes on the other on this trip. Here we were goofing off during a group picture. I love our expressions when zoomed in. I imagine him going "Brrrrm" like a poot sound and me cracking up.

Matthew makes me laugh like no one else. I didn't even know I could laugh like that! I get to the point where I cannot stop laughing and have difficulty breathing. My eyes water, I squeal, I make all kinds of strange noises when trying to get breath. Eventually I start coughing and it takes about 20 minutes to get back to a normal breathing pattern.

This was Dec. 21, 2004, the day after we officially began dating. Matthew came to my family Christmas. I am holding Livy who was only 2 months old. Matt was holding Calvin who was 5 months old. You can see the spit up on his sleeve and pants!

Matt has always been good with my nephews and nieces. He makes it a point to spend special time with each of them when we visit home. He took the time to get to know their individual personalities throughout their lives, even when we were just dating. I love that he is involved with my family.

June 2007. This is just moments after he popped the question. We were at Six Flags in Georgia with Matt's little brother and his then girlfriend. We had ridden the fast coasters all day and took a break for the skyride. When we took off from the depot Matt turned to me and began the speech. He got down on one knee in the small cab and asked me to marry him!

Matthew is always trying to plan something nice for me. He plans date nights to movies, day trips out of town for something different, gets me flowers on random days, brings home treats and goodies that he knows I like, and tried to schedule a prenatal massage for Valentine's Day for me. We wanted a couples massage but there was not availability when both of us were free and the prenatal masseuse was available. We may still try to find another time, but it truly is the thought that counts!

One of our engagement photos. I live the dark shading and our serious expressions.

I am so proud of my husband for training so hard to enter the military. He has pushed himself to his limits and has learned so much about perseverance, strength, and attitude- all things that will benefit his future military career.

Our wedding day.

My husband did all the dishes last night. I had been overly exhausted due to being sick, being in the third trimester, and working full time. I had let the dishes pile up and was cooking dinner when I really wanted to go straight to bed. While I was cooking dinner he did all the dishes. I told him I would do them later but he said he wanted to help.

Our wedding reception.

Matt always tries to plan nice trips for us. We went to London for our honeymoon. He mentioned the other day that we should go to Atlantis for a pre-deployment vacation before his first deployment. You do not understand just how amazing this is. I have wanted to go to Atlantis since MK & A did a movie there, I think that was in junior high? Matthew does not like hot weather and a vacation sitting on a beach all day does not appeal to him in the least. There is another destination we have been discussing for an anniversary trip, which may become the pre-deployment destination. Again, his willingness to plan a vacation just for me is enough!

Playing with baby kitten, Maxie, shortly after we brought him home in 2010.

I know Matthew will be a remarkable father. He has grown more and more in love with Jackson as this pregnancy has progressed. He talks to Jackson, kisses my belly, reads bedtime stories to Jackson. This may sound silly, but the way he plays with the kitties really does show how wonderful of a father he will be. If he can act that lovingly with cats how much stronger will he love our baby?

Winter 2010. Building a snowman.

I love how creative Matt is. He is so excited to play legos with Jackson. He already has big plans for the sets he will get Jack for birthdays and Christmas! It was difficult getting him to wait to buy those. Small pieces are not ideal for a little baby.

Our visit to Matt's parents in July 2011. This is right about the time baby Jackson was conceived!

I love how much Matt cares about his family. This is another reassurance of what an amazing father he will be.

The night I told Matt about Jackson. We got lucky that he is a he! I chose that outfit thinking it was gender neutral... it is SO much cuter for baby boy than for a possible baby girl.

Matthew has been getting excited about baby things. When we receive boxes in the mail he will text me that they have arrived. He usually adds something like "Yay!" to show his excitement. When we walk through stores he'll stop to look at cute onesies and sleepers. He wants to buy things for the baby just as much as I do. I love how involved he is.

These are just some of the reasons why I love my husband. I have been so incredibly blessed to have him as my second half. I could list many many more reasons why I am blessed and thankful for him... but for now, let me just say that I love my husband so much! Come What May was our wedding song. The main line is "Come what may I will love you to my dying day." Matthew certainly has not made that difficult for me. I am so thankful he is the father of my child and I cannot wait for them to meet!

[Edit: Feb. 13, 2012]

I originally planned to write this post because several of the stories below the pictures I had noticed recently. This made me really appreicate my husband. I forgot to include one story.

The other day I was sitting on the guest room bed reading. This is also where Matt's desk is located. Pictures to come once we organize that room a bit. We just moved the furniture in there recently due to needing the other space for the nursery. I was lying in there because we leave the door open for the cats and they don't like it when I go in our room and shut them out.

I noticed that on Matt's desk there was a framed picture of me that was not there before. This picture was a head shot of me at my high school open house. Unfortunately, if someone who didn't know me then saw the picture they might think it was taken recently. Similar hair style and I haven't changed all that much. Really? Seven years later and I don't look any older?

Anyways, he had rearranged his desk and the picture was right next to his monitor.

This is adorable.

And that is another reason why I love my husband!

Our relationship

I couldn't sleep last night. I slept for about 2 hours then lay wide awake for the next 3. After that I decided I might as well read until I fell asleep. I read... and then brought out the "Matt box". This holds lots of trinkets from our dating days including the three "Matt books". Journals from the beginning of our relationship. I leafed through these hoping to find when we chose the name "Jackson Matthew". Sadly, I did not find it in the first two books and didn't think it would be in the third. It might be in the emails that are in the box. It might be in a regular journal somewhere. It might not be anywhere in writing, which would be sad. But, I did some skimming while browsing those journals for the name "Jackson".

The first Matt book is all before we officially became a couple. Our relationship truly began in April 2004. The first journal started that month. I was pretty sure we had something special after our friendship started, but he was dating another girl. That entire book is the ups and downs, thrills with budding love and disappointments that made up the first leg of our relationship. The last time I read through that journal I got very angry at Matt. Now, it's not necessarily a good memory (there were lots of tears and confusion during that year) but it was rewarding seeing how quickly I "fell in love" with him and I "knew" he was my future husband. Of course, at the time I didn't "know" anything of the sort... or maybe God instilled it in my heart? But it was all true. It was right.

The last real entry of that first journal was December 20, 2004. The night Matthew officially asked me to be his girlfriend. That was also the night of our first kiss, my first kiss ever. There were about 3 pages left in the journal that I filled eventually, but it was way after the fact. Matt wishes I could just burn that book, but it's interesting to replay my emotions during that time. We made some bad choices (hanging out with each other alone when he had a girlfriend), but at the same time, I wonder if we would've still ended up together if we hadn't taken each step as it came.

The second Matt book was the first stretch of our dating relationship. I was in Michigan, a senior in high school. He was in Virginia, a freshman in college. We were apart, which was no fun. Before we became official we talked every day on the phone, so the long distance friendship just expanded. He was able to come to my Senior Homecoming Formal and my Junior/Senior Spring formal. Those events were extra special since he was able to come. It also helped break up the long stretches where we didn't see each other. I really believe that time apart helped us solidify our relationship. We were forced to work arguments out over the phone. We got to know about each other without the pressures of the physical relationship.

I didn't pull out the third Matt book and I'm not sure if I filled it entirely or what time period it covers. But the rest of the story is history. We dated all throughout college. We made the 12 hour trip home for holidays many many times together, which certainly helped us build patience! We got to know each other's families as well as anyone prior to marriage. It was nice because we know all of each others high school and college friends. It's nice to be able to tell him about someone and he know exactly who I am talking about.

As I was reading various entries, it struck me how different Matt and I are as individuals than we were during those years. The entires were primarily from 2004 and 2005. I would've been 17 and 18 and he was 19 and 20. In the years since then we have both grown and matured so much. While I was reading my memories, it was almost like I was reading the story of two totally different people than Matt and I! I hadn't realized how much we had changed. Not only have we grown as individuals, but as spouses we have learned so much about honoring each other, loving each other unconditionally, and supporting each other. I truly am so blessed to have such an amazing husband who seeks to grow with me. I am very thankful we are not the same people we were 8 years ago.

One more interesting thing I gleaned from those journals: we do a LOT for our significant other than we wouldn't every dream of doing once we're spouses! Hopefully the reverse is true as well, but during the dating stage we are trying to impress. Matt sang me songs, danced with me, offered to take dance classes even. Now... none of that would even be a possibility. But also, I don't need him to offer to do those kinds of things anymore. I know it would make him uncomfortable. But the fact that he offered back then warms my heart.

Matthew will make such a great Daddy! I cannot wait for Jackson to get here so we can love on him together. I'm not sure if I'll ever share those journals with any of our kids, but I'll certainly tell them stories from them!

26

This will be the first of three posts today. Because yesterday just wasn't working for me to remain conscious long enough to update. I dragged myself out of bed. Went to work for a half day, because my boss is awesome. Went to the gym with Matt- this is how we spend time together. Took a short nap after showering. Woke up to get pretty to go to Matt's birthday dinner. Came home and went straight to bed for another nap. Woke up around 9 pm to eat birthday pie with Matt. Watched an episode or two of Grey's. Bed. Slept in this morning because I just couldn't wake up. Still exhausted. Ridiculous.

So... my husband's birthday was yesterday! 26 years old. No longer in his mid-twenties. Well, ok. He's technically still mid-twenty for one more year... but 26 seems to be in the late twenties.

Sometimes I hate posting about the awesomeness of my husband. Because whatever I say it always seems superficial. But honestly, my husband is amazing. He is loving and caring and patient... all things I need. He is ambitious, hard working, and loyal... all things required to be successful in this world. He is a thinker, empathetic, and kind... which the entire world needs more of. Most importantly, he loves his Lord and desires to serve Him in all he does.

Matt has been blessed with 26 years of life. I have been blessed to be a part of that life for the past 8 years. I look forward to the next handful of decades together to grow and love each other more and more. Sometimes when I think about our relationship and how it all began... I just can't believe we actually ended up together. When Matt and I first started unofficially dating we would say, "Matt Iveson and Becca Bonnell... who ever would have thought?". But we are perfect together.

Happy Birthday to my amazing husband. He is handsome and I love him.

Brag

My husband the Marine.
Well, almost. He had his last PFT (personal fitness test) this morning for Officer Candidate School for the U.S. Marine Corps. We decided he would try for a position in the Corps last summer and he began the process of entry in August.
Now in October he finally did the last step to be considered for a position.
We should find out in the next month if he has been selected for Active Duty.
We would really prefer Active Duty for several reasons, but most people don't understand them.
We are excited to find out what life on base is like. Enter the community and all.
Matthew would be able to gain such great experience and training as Active Duty- not that as a Reservist he wouldn't.
He would only get full pay while deployed as Active Duty... which is not preferable.
Benefits are handled differently.
They way deployments, training, etc would be handled.
Having to find a central location to make home and Matt having to find a primary job for when he is not is not in training/deployed... and that job being alright with him leaving on occasion (yes, there are laws about this... but it still could be difficult).
Matt's personal goals about going into the military.
The mission field we envision for while living on base, yes, this could be carried over to other Reservist families or people in general.

So we are hoping for Active Duty. Yes, it will be hard. Yes, I will probably feel very lonely the times he is gone.
But that will be true for Reservist status as well. He'll still have training and he could potentially deploy more often than if he were Active Duty.

Anyways, he had his last PFT this morning.
This score will go in his portfolio that will be presented to the review board.
While his GPA and AS-VAB scores are significantly higher than his competitors, this is not the first thing that is considered.
PFT has higher ranking than the other qualifications.
Matt's score is 292/300. The average scores for the past two OCS (officer candidate school) classes was in the 280's.
So his score is high... but if someone else who is attempting January scores higher they could get the spot.
Now, to our knowledge no one else has scored higher than him at this point. But the other applicants will be doing their final PFT's here shortly.

We just keep praying that we will be accepting of whatever God has for us.
If Matt is not selected for Active Duty, then God obviously has different plans for us.
It is easy to have that mindset right now though. Ask again if he is not selected.
We're hoping for Active Duty.

Yes, we have a lot going on right now.
The baby.
Me traveling... a lot.
Matt working his butt off to meet these requirements in less than ideal circumstances and while he has been feeling under the weather (which seems about right for the Marines).

All prayers are coveted and welcomed.
Thank you so much for your support, family and friends.