Birth Story

Birth is... an adventure. But it is all so worth it!

Introducing: Jackson Matthew Iveson

Born: March 26, 2012

Time: 13:46

Length: 20.5 inches

Weight: 7 lbs. 3 oz.

He is so handsome!

So... our story.

For the entire week before he arrived I had begun feeling contractions. I could tell my middle was contracting for a long while before that, but there was no pain associated. The contractions still weren't painful, but I could feel a twang with each one. For the entire weekend (beginning around Thursday) I thought the contractions were getting closer together and much more regular. Sunday around 1:00 pm I suggested we begin to track the contractions. At that time they were around 10-20 minutes apart. Throughout the afternoon we kept track off and on. Around 10 pm my contractions were around 5 minutes apart and lasting 1 minute or longer. According to birth class I was supposed to head to the hospital at this point. They still weren't super painful so I decided to wait. I wasn't able to sleep so I just sat around feeling those contractions.

Between then and 3 am I took two long baths (which helped the pain enormously) and walked around in the bedroom a lot. At 3 am I woke up Matt to encourage me. I still didn't think we needed to go to the hospital, but I needed someone to distract me. The contractions started getting much stronger so Matt went to take a shower and shave. Don't want to go to the hospital all grungy when you don't know how long the labor will last! I planned to take a shower and braid my hair to keep it out of my face... yeah, that didn't happen. I just wanted to get to the hospital and have that baby!

We arrived at the hospital around 4:30 am. While we were at the registration desk I had two contractions. Semi-embarrassing but I know that it's nothing the labor and delivery nurses haven't seen before! Had a check up to be sure I was actually in labor and there was no question! I was 6 cm and having very regular, strong contractions. As the nurse was checking me I told her, "If this isn't real labor then it's a really cruel joke!". We got admitted to our room around 5 am.

Baby and I were monitored until around 6 am. For this time I mainly leaned over my bed and rocked back and forth through the contractions. At this point there were several peaks (or so it seemed) to each contraction and when it was "over" it had the pain level of the contractions I had when I woke Matt up. That sentence is confusing, but basically there was no rest period between contractions which was less than ideal. You hear that you won't care what comes out of your mouth during labor... I thought I would be embarrassed and try to keep all my grunting/gasping inside. Yeah, not happening. It's true! You don't care what you sound or look like! Matt was wonderful! I was extremely unpleasant to him and almost broke all his fingers! I got in the tub and it no longer helped... at all. I think it actually made the labor worse! By this time my arms and legs were shaking uncontrollably. I tried to get them to stop but there was no doing. Matt kept telling me to relax, but I physically couldn't. Breathing wasn't helping and when I got into a breathing rhythm that did help the nurse told me not to do it that way. (Excuse me, was she feeling the contractions?) I was worried my calves would cramp up (as they often do) with all the shaking.

I decided to get an epidural. I had weighed the pros and cons and decided to go for it. The anesthesiologist was amazing! I was having a contraction while he was placing the epidural so it was not comfortable, but he worked quickly and literally within one second of him saying the "Ok" I felt immediate relief. They had prepared me for a 5-15 minute wait for the meds to kick in. The nurse told me I was having a contraction and I couldn't feel it at all! A sense of euphoria set in then (we realized this later). I was so thrilled that the pain was gone! The difference in my demeanor was immediate. I have no regrets in getting the epidural. I was able to relax during the last part of labor and just bask in the excitement of having my baby! This was around 7 am and I was 7 cm at that time.

Around 10 am the nurses checked me again. While I felt no pain, I still had feeling in my legs. It felt like when they fall asleep, all rubbery. I was 8 cm... so still making progress and no need for Pitocin, which was good since I was opposed to using that drug. Matt asked me when I thought the baby would arrive. I guessed before 2 pm. He guessed before 4 pm. During this exam my water broke and there was meconium in it. This meant that baby would need to be suctioned immediately after birth so my plan for skin-to-skin immediately after birth was foiled. While I was slightly disappointed in this, it is much more important to be sure baby is safe and hasn't inhaled any of the meconium.

At 11:45 am the Doctor came in to check my progress. Before he checked he warned me that if I wasn't still progressing they would begin pitocin to speed things along. I was opposed to using pitocin, but figured we could argue about this if need be. We were all surprised that I was 10 cm and at a positive station. We're ready to go! While I was slightly nervous about the next stage, I was so excited to be ready!

Ar 12:20 pm it was time to start pushing. At first it was just the nurse, Matt, and I. It was interesting pushing without feeling. I tried to concentrate on that area, but wasn't sure how successful I was being. The nurse and Matt told me I was doing well and making progress. Eventually Matt was able to see the top of baby's head. I laughed at that and it ruined that push, but we were that much closer to our baby! They asked if I wanted to use a mirror to watch. I had no interest in a mirror throughout my entire pregnancy, but Matt convinced me to at least try. It was amazing being able to see my baby emerge little by little. It helped tremendously to see when the baby would slip back inside during certain pushes. When I saw that I would push harder!

Around 1:20 pm the Doctor came in. The head was crowning and he said we were good to get that baby born! Only 26 minutes later... our little man was born! Again, I couldn't feel any pain (such a blessing) but I could feel the pressure of having an infant pushed through me. Such a strange feeling.

At 1:46 pm Jackson Matthew fully emerged. He was placed on my abdomen while the cord was being cut. (later Matt told me that the umbilical cord had been wrapped around Jack's neck. He noticed it when Jack was first emerging, but before he could grow alarmed the Dr. slipped the cord around Jack's head and began to suction his nose and mouth. I'm so thankful no one said anything about it at the time because I probably would have freaked out just a little) Immediately I began to cry. It was such a rush of emotions. I'm sure some of it was hormonal, but also I was hit with this intense love for my little boy! I couldn't help but stroke his head, face, arms. Matt cut the cord and we were pleased to hear our baby's first cries. The doctor had told us that was a good indicator that he had not inhaled any meconium. He did go over to the peds nurses to be suctioned out just to be safe. They worked quickly and brought Jack back to me as soon as possible. As he lay on my chest I was so thankful for this wonderful little blessing.

This is me moments after receiving my baby boy. Here he is a little grey, but he colored up real nice in the next couple or hours.

I lay there stroking Jackson's beautiful hair and kissing him. I had two tears (a small one in front and a second degree tear in back) that the doctor stitched up and Jackson had his first little meal. Then it was time for Jackson's first bath. Daddy went to the corner of the room with Jackson and the nurses and watched his bath and measurements. Such a handsome little baby!

Our first picture as a family! We are so thrilled with our baby. He is so beautiful and perfect!

Daddy's first time holding baby Jackson. Jack calmed down whenever Matt or I held him. We would talk to him while we held him and he would stop crying and just relax. He has been hearing both of our voices while in utero, which we hoped would help when he was out. Mission accomplished!

We then moved to our room in the mother/baby unit for our 48 hour stay. We had a very roomy room and it was a wonderful stay. More on that later, I plan to write weekly updates on Jackson. Week one (next Monday) will include our hospital stay and the recovery period.

We were very ready to go home with our new addition!

We are so blessed! This adventure of parenthood has been so incredible thusfar. I cannot believe that God has entrusted us with this little life!

We love you so much, baby Jackson!

38.5 Weeks

Even though this is after the fact, I wanted to do one last pregnancy post. I had planned on doing this during the labor-at-home stage... but that obviously didn't happen. More details on that in the birth story. For now, I have a couple minutes while baby is content not to be held (a rarity).

38 Weeks and 5 days. I was sure baby would be coming soon! I had originally thought he would arrive over that weekend. Half right, as he began arriving over the weekend!

I meant to get one last pregnancy picture before we left for the hospital. Again, definitely didn't happen.

Progression: As I had been dilating for a few weeks I figured it was time to try to jump start labor! My last Dr. appointment found I was at 4 cm... which my book says is technically active labor. I wasn't having regular contractions or even painful ones yet. I began walking down the halls at work every couple hours to improve circulation, give me something to do, and to hopefully speed along that dilation. I would walk every couple of hours, which added about 1-2 miles per day to my steps! Not bad and probably really good for me either way with my swollen ankles and legs. While at home I started sitting on my exercise ball when watching TV or eating a snack. It relieved some of the pressure on my hips and supposedly helped baby to drop since gravity was doing it's thing. Not too sure about the latter, but since the former was true I really wasn't going to be too picky! On Saturday Matt and I went to the gym. I ellipticalled for 2 miles (definitely the slowest 2 miles I've ever done), did the leg weights I've continued through pregnancy, and went to stretch and do some free weights for my arms. Stretching proved very difficult. I convinced Matt to leave a little early as I was super tired. Trying to prompt baby to make his appearance!

Anticipation: The anticipation of going into full blown labor was the worst! I kept waking up thinking, "Today would be a great day to have a baby... oh dear! Maybe baby can just stay snuggly in there!" I would go back and forth in utter excitement with no room for any other emotion to fear of the birthing process. I was so ready to meet him, however, I definitely wanted him to come sooner rather than later. On Saturday night I had a dream that my water broke and I was super excited. It was one of those dreams where I was sleeping, the water broke, I got up to confirm, went and got Matt, and we prepared to have the baby. It was so realistic and felt like it was actually happening! I was very disappointed when I actually woke up. Throughout the weekend I packed and repacked my bag and baby's bag for the hospital. I took out some things I didn't think we would actually need and added a few new items. I printed out our birth plan and added that to the baby bag. I did some more cleaning around the house, but didn't want to completely re-do everything I had already finished in that department. Our house is ready for baby! Sunday afternoon Matt and I went grocery shopping specifically to stock up our freezer. Thankfully, we were pleasantly surprised when we got the total at checkout. Not nearly as bad as we had anticipated. We wanted to dig into that food right then though! At least we wouldn't have much longer to wait!

Labor: Over the entire weekend I was having my "bloody show". I had thought that losing the plug and the show were the same thing. Now I know that they are two separate occurrences and it makes more sense that baby didn't come after my plug detached. I tried not to get too excited about the show as I knew baby could still wait awhile to come... but I was hopeful! I started getting stronger contractions throughout Sunday... but more on that in the birth story post (coming soon!). At one point I said to Matt, "If baby's coming then fine, but if this isn't real labor it SO isn't worth it!"

Thankfully, it WAS worth it!

Pregnancy fin.

Waiting is the Worst

Now, I'm going to skip on details until my weekly post... but waiting is the absolute worst! I've been sitting around all weekend hoping to possibly be able to pop out this baby... but he's still all snuggled up inside. Which, of course, is also a good thing.

What with dilation and contractions... I really doubt this baby will wait until his due date of April 4. I could be totally and completely wrong of course, but that's just my inkling. My family has all made predictions and all are for before his due date. The one that seems most likely at the moment would be less than ideal because Matt is scheduled to be out of town for Army business! Now, thankfully, the Army is aware that we are expecting any day now so a call saying he can't go because we're at the hospital wouldn't be unexpected. Part of me wants baby to come (so he's here) and Matt to go later. But... it would also be great if Matt could get all this finished so we don't have to worry about it any longer. If he goes on this trip after the baby comes then I'll have 2 days and 1 night on my own with our newborn. Kinda intimidating!

Again, in my weekly post of my "last post" (which I'll plan to write before we go to the hospital) I'll give more details, but let's just say this weekend has been trying. Both mentally, physically, and emotionally. Thank the Lord for my husband who is so patient and willing and loving. Mood swings in full force with all the happenings.

Either way... almost baby time! The fact that the countdown is at 10 days is incredible! COme on baby! Mommy and Daddy cannot wait to hold you and love on you!

38 Weeks

Another week down. It is comforting that I can only have 4 weeks left maximum. I seriously don't know where else this kid will grow for much longer! My skin is so tight and I can feel my middle getting more and more full! On the plus side, baby continues to drop so that relieves some pressure.

Dr. Appt: Had my weekly appointment today. Dr. was disappointed he didn't see me at the hospital on Monday, which was his day on call. I'm still progressing and am at 4 cm dilated now. Matt said, "You've been going 1 cm a week. Only 6 weeks left!" Har har har. The Dr. stripped my membranes in an effort to get some contractions going. I only had 5 noticeable contractions all of yesterday... so not exactly what we want while I'm continuing to dilate. I was encouraged that I wasn't still stuck at 3 cm though. Of course, I could be stuck at 4 from here on out!

Pregnancy Symptoms: Like I said, I've had contractions... but not with any regularity and not too intense. I feel a slight pang in my lower abdomen and then can feel my uterus tighten up when I rest my hands on it. But no pain or real discomfort, just annoyance. Lost my plug on Saturday. No grimy details, but it was encouraging to have one more thing behind me. I have also traded my wedding ring for a cubic zirconia replacement. My real wedding ring still fits... but just in case I thought it wise to replace it while I can. With the extra warm weather we've been having I'd probably swell in the middle of the day and not be able to get it off! I had some cramps, but they haven't accompanied any contractions yet. I've continued to be rather warm no matter where I go or if the air conditioning is on. I've been waking up every 2 hours during the night for a potty break. This being the case, I have bags under my eyes for the first time ever! They aren't that noticeable with my complexion, but I can certainly notice them. Just getting ready for those first few weeks of nighttime feedings! I definitely was nesting over the weekend. I was able to get the guest bedroom/Matt's office organized the way I want. Cleaned the entire bathroom (as in scrubbed scrubbed scrubbed!). Finished the nursery (see pictures below). Cleaned the kitchen and organized the downstairs in general. Did lots of laundry. Reorganized some things in our bedroom... and now I think our bedroom is more organized than it ever had been before! It is so nice having a nice clean house! Matt has been amazing and taken over the vacuuming, which I hate doing even when I'm not pregnant. We're all ready for Jackson to arrive! I've even packed and repacked both my and Jackson's hospital bags! Matt has some stuff in my bag as well (an extra change of clothes, some bathroom stuff, snacks). Just waiting waiting waiting!

Overall health: I did slip one pound over my pregnancy weight gain goal, but I'm not too worried about it. I hit 26 pounds gained, which is still rather low. Hopefully that'll make losing those pounds easier if there aren't as many of them. Slight swelling that I already mentioned. My skin has been amazing the past couple weeks. I noticed it last week. Got that "ready-to-pop-out-a-baby" glow! Still feeling really good, even though I have a full on waddle. When I walk Matt likes to hum the ewok song. He says I look like Wicket when I waddle. Still no stretch marks, which I am so thankful for. I didn't think I would care about stretch marks, but I am glad they haven't arrived. No cravings or aversions this week. Been eating lots of fruits and vegetables and can't stop drinking water! Maybe that's been helping with my skin too.

Here are some pictures of our finished nursery. This when you first walk in the door.

The left side of the room. No set theme, just bright, bold, boy colors.

The window area and his crib. I don't plan on him using his crib for at least the first 4 months... we'll see when I'm ready to part with him being by my bedside!

I didn't like the empty space on this wall. We aren't able to paint the walls in our house since we rent, so I put up a bulletin board!

Last wall. The frame will have a new poster in it. It should be arriving in the mail any day now. His closet is nice and full. We should be set from newborn size- 12 months. We have some 18 month stuff, but we focused mainly on the first year. He will be such a well dressed little man!
There are more detailed pictures on facebook. I love his nursery! I go in there to sit and day dream sometimes. I can hear Matt going from room to room looking for me and then he'll peek in the nursery and I'm sitting there rocking back and forth. We keep the door closed so the cats don't ruin anything.

Preggo dream: I had a dream that I was on the way to a friend's graduation party. I was in the car with four other girls. Something happened (I don't remember what, but I don't even think it was pregnancy related) and one of the girls said, "We have to go to the hospital right now. You need to have a C-section." This girl has had a C-section so we trusted her. We were driving down 2 Mile back home, which is a dirt road. I was distraught because Matt wasn't with us and I didn't have a camera. I wanted to stop by the house real quick to get the camera at least, but there was no time. I was very sad.

Getting so close to the end! I just wish I knew when he was coming. The anticipation is the worst! But also, so exciting! Anywhere from 1 day to 4 weeks until we're holding our little man! 14 days until due date!

37 Weeks.

37 weeks! Officially full term and {{mostly}} ready for baby to arrive!

Now that I am full term I keep telling myself that “baby is coming this week” to make sure I’m ready and prepared. I honestly wouldn’t mind if baby comes late, but I’m just so anxious to hold him! Of course, I have begun getting more nervous about the whole birthing process. Now that it’s “here” I’m not quite as cool as I’ve been for the past 9 months. While I still think “It’ll happen. The baby will be born one way or another. Every human on earth was born and has a mother who birthed him/her. I can do it”… I also think “How in the world is this child supposed to get out?” Honestly, c-sections look better and better… but not the side effects and recovery period.

Dr. Appt: Had my weekly appointment yesterday. I am now 3 cm dilated! Progress! Could still be a few weeks for those last 7 cm… but I’m hoping not. Either way, it’s super exciting to know that my body is preparing for birth. Makes it seem like it really is the end of the line! I also have had a little spotting, which could mean a number of things. It seems kind of cruel that spotting occurs so close to the end. I mean, every pregnant woman's nightmare is to have spotting, right? Called my dad (a Dr.), called the hospital, called a friend who's had a baby... all said the same thing. Just wait it out. If it's a lot then go to the hospital. We'll see in the days to come if baby is getting ready to make his appearance early!

Symptoms: Still having rather regular Braxton Hicks contractions. By regular, I don’t mean they are coming every hour on the hour or anything like that. I mean I feel them throughout the day, every day. Most are not painful, but slightly uncomfortable since my torso is so short. My entire middle seems to tighten up so when I’m sitting in my desk chair it feels like I need to stretch. Of course, stretching doesn’t help until the contraction has passed. Maybe my labor contractions will be similar? No pain? That would be a-mazing. Today I did have one that was slightly painful, but not too bad. It was mostly different because I felt a pang in my abdomen before realizing it was all tight. Baby has definitely dropped as well. Sometimes it’s hard to see on the outside, but I can definitely tell. It doesn’t feel as snug when I am sitting in my desk at work and I can feel more pressure towards the bottom of my middle instead of right at the top. I have also begun feeling hot/warm all the time. I sit on the couch and throw off the blankets. I wake up and feel like I’m glistening. Not pleasant and we have turned on the air conditioning… but it honestly doesn’t help much. While my feet and legs don’t look that swollen, apparently they are. I can’t comfortably wear my knee high boots anymore. I loved wearing those over my skinny jeans… but no more until after baby! I can still get them on… but by the end of the day my legs are in want of proper circulation! Thankfully, my hands and face haven’t swelled noticeably. No new weight gain. Hoping this keeps up until baby arrives! If I stayed right at 25 preggo pounds that would be fabulous. I weigh myself around the same time in the mornings so I can keep accurate track. The scale at the Dr. office sometimes shows some weight gain… but that’s because my appts are in the afternoon at varying times so it really depends on what I’ve eaten that day. I try to weigh myself every 3 days or so. Last symptom of the week: I had a slight bruise on the top left side of my belly where Jack typically kicks. He hasn’t been kicking super hard, but he does kick the same spot frequently. I noticed a nice blue spot there the other day. Lovely little memento from baby!

Preparation: Matt and I had our last date night before baby! Even once baby comes and we go on date nights… it will never be the same. For the first while I’ll just be anxious to get back home to the baby, I’m sure.. There weren’t really any movies we were interested in seeing, so our date was very short and sweet. We went to Applebee’s because Matt had wanted to go there. Nothing fancy, but certainly delicious. The next day we decided to extend our date night since it was so casual and got Dickie’s for lunch. We’ve been cutting way back on eating out so these two meals were certainly a treat. I have been so blessed with my husband and cannot wait to see him in action as a Daddy. To prepare the nursery, we have been ordering the last few necessities we need. I found three gift cards I forgot we had so that certainly helped. My trade-ins for my textbooks came through on Amazon as well so that money was quickly used. We had several large boxes to throw away once everything was put away. Our neighbors commented on the baby coming so soon, which is always fun. We don’t have real personal relationships with our neighbors, but we do say hello when we pass each other. I have also been trying to finish all my crafts for the nursery. We made feet and hand prints to frame of Mommy and Daddy. We’ll do Jackson’s prints once he’s here. Each of our prints is on a different colored paper so it will add color to the plain white walls. We have both been reading to baby. I have begun reading my devotions out loud to him, which I hope to continue to do once baby comes. Matt has been reading baby books to him. It is so fun to feel Jackson begin to move as soon as he hears Matt’s voice. While we can’t be 100% positive he’s reacting to Matt’s voice, he begins moving right after he starts each night. Coincidence? Every night? I hope he is familiar with both of our voices so when he arrives he’ll be soothed by either. Speaking of nighttime: I have been waking every night at around 2 and 5 to use the restroom. Is my body perhaps preparing me for nightly feedings? Once I return to work after maternity leave I am sure I will be so exhausted each and every day… but I am so looking forward to those nighttime feedings. Time for just me and my baby!

Cravings/Aversions: No aversions, which is definitely a blessing. I’m planning on having a ham and cheese sandwich as my first post baby meal… and then probably for many lunches after that! I have missed my ham and cheese sandwiches! I also ate almost an entire block of Colby Jack cheese in one sitting! We had to go buy some more! It was so delicious. I drink a lot of milk, eat a lot of cheese, and love yogurt… I don’t think baby has any calcium needs! I also HAD to have a midnight snack the other night. It was actually a 2 am snack. I woke up and was thinking about breakfast sandwiches. I thought about going back to sleep and waking up early enough to make them for breakfast. Nope. Got out of bed, made my egg, toasted my English muffin, added the cheese… delicious! Hit the spot. Also still drinking lots and lots of Apple Raspberry Juice. Matt got home last night from an overnight trip and couldn’t believe I had drank all my juice. He thinks we should’ve invested in the stock of the brand! It’s just delicious though, I can’t stop at just one glass!

Worries: Like I said, I have begun to worry slightly about the birthing process. I think it’s a normal kind of worry. I do feel like we’re well prepared for varying circumstances. I also have begun to worry about the first year of Jackson’s life. We have decided that I will return to work and Matt will stay home with the baby. We’re hoping to know about his selection into the Army Officer Candidate School by June/July. If he is selected then he’ll have a lot of training to do, which will take him away from me and the baby. This way he gets a good amount of time with Jackson before he leaves. Plus, many entry level jobs he has been looking at do not pay enough for our monthly expenses. So I would have to return to work anyways. I would rather Jackson stay home with his Daddy than with a sitter or childcare provider. I have begun to worry that Jackson will then grow super attached to his Daddy and when he leaves for training that may cause some issues. By that time I would probably leave my job and stay home with Jackson. I am slightly worried about how the cats will react to Jackson, but not too much. Lots of families have pets that adjust to new babies. Our cats are super spoiled… but hopefully they’ll enjoy having Matt home most of the day, even if his attention is focused on the baby. I had a mini freak-out session this morning about if I am ready to be a mother and if I will be a good mother. Matt quickly calmed my fears and in his devotions he even read me a verse about labor pains, but joy coming once the baby was born. The Word of God truly is living, giving us just what we need when we need it!

Overall, I feel very ready to meet my baby. Whether he decides to come this week… next week… or five weeks from now… I will be so excited to meet him! I have this image of what he will look like, so we’ll see! This image is a good mixture of Matt and I, but of course, I’m assuming a lot of his features will look more Asian.

I meant to finish his nursery tonight so I could post pictures. I still might finish the nursery, but pictures will have to wait. Almost ready!

36 Weeks.

36 Weeks today! That is 9 months! Baby could come anywhere from 1 day from now to 6 weeks from now! Let's hope for a nice compromise somewhere between there. Belly is getting bigger and bigger!

Nursery preparation: I have almost finished the nursery. Matthew did some work on it this morning as well. I am so excited for it to be finished and ready for Jackson. Some crafts I did to cut costs: I saw these adorable initial prints on etsy that I loved for his monogram above the crib. The prints were $50 each! Ick. So... I decided to make something similar. I bought some shadow boxes, wooden letters, craft paper, and stickers. When all was put together... I had three lovely frames with a "J', "M", and "I" respectively. I love how they turned out! It was under $25 total for the entire project. I also wanted a large print or canvas I could use with a quote or verse for Jackson. I thought about purchasing a large canvas and painting something, but then realized I had a large frame with professional artwork in it that wasn't being used. I never really liked the picture of trees in the frame, but it was a hand-me-down from my parents so I hadn't bothered to change the artwork. I plan to either have printed or make out of posterboard a print with a variation of Luke 2:52 for Jackson. The "wisdom", "stature", and "favor" will be larger and centered and the other words will be smaller. Hopefully it'll turn out exactly how I want. For the changing table, I used old mailing boxes to hold diapers. We are cloth diapering and I have close to 30 newborn size and will have 30 one size once I've finished purchasing them. I have around 18 one size right now. I could buy bins... but we have so many different sized boxes from baby things that I figured why not cut costs? I am looking for cutesy wrapping paper to wrap the boxes in to match the nursery. I also needed more storage in the closet, so I used some plastic drawers that were previously in the office in the closet. The perfect place for Jackson's pants and extra items we don't need quite yet (like extra shampoo, etc).

Preparing for baby: We rearranged the nursery furniture. It was Matt's idea because he didn't like walking into the room and having the changing table immediately to the left. It seemed cluttered to him. Well, after we moved things around it does feel much more open. We also now have room for a bookshelf! It will have some bins for his pacis and bibs and also room for all his books. I love books and cannot wait to continue adding to his library. I also have been ordering more diapers as the colors I want come in stock. I have received some checks from work to reimburse my gas and mileage for trips I've made. You get $0.555 per gallon when you use your personal vehicle so I receive more than I actually spent on gas. I used that money to add to the diaper stash. It is incredible how much you can spend on diapers... but it would be so much more if we were doing disposable. I also placed orders at Target and Babies R Us for some necessities we had not received yet. Very thankful for the 10% discount coupons we received and gift cards from friends and family. I sold some books to Amazon and once that credit I has been added to my account I will order the last few items we need before he arrives. Almost completely prepared for baby!

Maternity Photo Shoot: On Sunday we had our maternity photo shoot. Matt was such a champ! It was very cold outside (it ended up snowing later that night!) but we toughed it out for some super adorable pictures. There have been so many comments on the pictures so far. My friend, Danielle, took the pictures for free for us, but she does have her own photography business, D.Christine Photografie. I highly recommend her for any and all photo shoots: engagement, wedding, bridal, family, infant, maternity, just for fun. She is so talented and so much fun to work with. The pictures were exactly what I wanted- a warm, romantic feel with some vintage-y appeal. The below pictures are all from the shoot. There are some more and she's still editing more, but these are some of my favorites so far!

Pregnancy symptoms: Now that I am in the home stretch I have begun having some more of the typical symptoms. No new cravings or aversions. My feet and calves have swollen slightly. I can still wear all my pants and shoes, but I can definitely notice they are not as slim as normal. Since my belly is so big, I have to have help from Matt to put on my socks or boots! I normally wear flats to work so it's not such a big deal. I have been drinking much more water. It's hard getting in around 10 glasses a day! Plus, that means I have to constantly pee which is not convenient in my office! At least I no longer am a call center agent. I don't know how that would work with the constant restroom breaks! I have also begun having random bursts of emotion. I have tried to compose myself fairly well about the uncertainty of our future. On Sunday I was feeling very emotional around lunch time and felt horrible for crying. I didn't want Matt to feel bad about not knowing about the Army and being unemployed currently. We have enough money saved to cover our expenses while I am on maternity leave, but I was still emotional about the entire situation. I cried for about 5 minutes and then was fine. Very sudden and random. Understandable in the circumstances, but I want to be strong and supportive. Last symptom: I have reached 25 pounds of preggo weight. Supposedly my weight is supposed to cap pretty soon or possible lower as I get closer to delivery? I hope so. I would love to stay right at 25 lb.s or lower. That was my original goal. I am also creeping up on Matt's weight! He is a rather small person himself, but I don't want to weigh the same as my husband!

Blessings: Even though it is slightly stressful, it has been such a blessing to have Matt home. I enjoy spending the evenings with him. He has taken up most of the household chores including vaccuuming, mopping, grocery shopping, going to the post office, laundry, dishes, and cooking dinner. It was so nice to have a long day of work on Monday where I had to travel out of town for the day and to return home to an excellent dinner! He had made some new dishes he never made before and it was all so delicious! He is such an amazing husband and I cannot wait to watch him interact with Jackson. Another blessing, having such caring and supportive family and friends. With our current financial situation being what it is we have been so blessed to have most of the baby things covered from showers or other gifts. Plus we have had some more recent financial blessings towards the "baby fund" that are so helpful! This is why we are not super worried about the job situation. God will continue to look after us and our growing family.

Dr. Appt: I had a Dr. appt yesterday, which will be a common story throughout the next month of weekly appointments. Had my Group B Strep test done. After my examination the dr. was surprised to find that I am 2 cm dilated and the baby is at a -2 station! He was actually able to touch the baby's head! While I know that the next 8 cm could take awhile to dilate, that is still encouraging! The Dr. said that is more progression than normal at 36 weeks. He said his day at the hospital this week is Sunday, but he would prefer not to see me then. He said to rest up this week and then come next week when I'm full term I can have that baby any time! I will certianly begin walking, jumping, anything I can to help that baby be born! So exciting (and nerve-wrecking) that it's so close! I have definitely been having contractions daily, but still not painful or close together by any means. I asked the Dr. about the thumps I feel on the left side of my ribs. I had thought they were knees or elbows, but then wondered if they were feet. The Dr. confirmed it was little Jackson's ankles I had been feeling. I knew it was something with a "crook". So incredible to be able to feet the bend where his ankle is so clearly!

Dreams: I had an interesting dream last night, probably due to the news from the Dr. I dreamt I was at my old house and was in the bathroom. I decided I wanted to hold the baby so I birthed him. It was simple and no pain. I held him for a bit and planned to "put him back" when I was done. Strange how dream world works, eh? So I was holding him and his legs were perfectly formed and he was breathing just fine. His arms and hands, however, we more like flippers. His face also didn't look too human. More like some kind of sea creature. He was completely healthy other than that. So he needed to cook a little longer so his arms, hands, and face could finish forming. Definitely not the regular order of development! Right before the dream ended I remembered the check to make sure he was a boy! No doubt about it, all boy! I have been a little nervous that the u/s was wrong and he's actually a girl! I would love having a girl, but would be slightly stressed since all our baby things are blue!

We are so excited that we have a month or less left before meeting our little guy. I'd be happy if he came next week or even 5 weeks from now! I hope he doesn't take the full 6 weeks the Dr.'s would give him before inducing. I would prefer not to be induced if possible. Can't wait to see what happens in the next couple weeks!

So glad we were able to do this shoot. I love these pictures! Can't wait for our newborn shoot for Jackson and then family shoot when he's a couple months old!

Mr. Mom

Matt and I have joked about the possibility that he will be "Mr. Mom" once Jackson comes. On the one hand, he will most definitely NOT be Mr. Mom. He will be Mr. Dad: homemaker. There is only one mommy in this house and it is me. On the other hand, it would be extremely hard for me to return to full time work if he was able to stay home with the baby. On the third hand (wink), if I go back to work then him being able to stay home with the baby is a lot better than a nanny or daycare center.

He will continue to look for a new job, of course, but if he can't find something that will completely cover our monthly expenses then we may decide to live on my paycheck and he stay home. Or if we find out good news about the Army and when he might go to Basic, then it might be better for me to return to work if it wouldn't be a long wait. No point in him starting a new job if he just has to leave it a few months later. So many options. I have been so grateful for the attitude God has given me recently. I did have one breakdown about all the unknowns... but for the most part I have been on board with the possibilities for our future. I have learned to trust God. After all, He has continued to bless us throughout the first 3.5 years of marriage. Why not now?

For now, Matthew has proved to be a very responsible and caring homemaker. He has really stepped up and done a lot of household chores, run errands for me, and even surprises me with dinner preparations. He mopped all our floors the other day and made a delicious steak dinner with sides and everything. This was after my last work trip before the baby arrives and I was very exhausted and kind of in a bad mood. I come home and what a great surprise!

Even when I am home, he does the dishes and laundry and gets upset when he hears me working on those things. He says it is now his responsibility and I need to rest. Seriously, amazing husband!

I feel like we are almost "ready" for the baby to come. A few more minor things to do in the nursery, cleaning the bathrooms nice and good, and making sure I have all the insurance forms I need. This weekend I plan to get everything in order and then we'll be ready for whenever Mr. Jackson decides it's time to be born!

It is so nice having Matt home with me. I love being able to spend time with him. It's also nice to be able to text him throughout the day if I forgot to do something or need something from the store. He has been so patient and loving and willing to do anything I need.

I am truly blessed. I saw a quote the other day on Facebook that was along the lines of "Marry a man you would want your son to become." That is so true and I have certainly done just that!

Pre-nesting

Everyone says nesting happens when you are about ready to pop. It's supposed to be one of the precursors. Well, I don't really think I will be birthing a baby in the next week... but I do think my nesting instinct has kicked in. I normally come home from work. Relax with my husband (now that he's home at least), make dinner when we both feel hungry, watch a movie or a few episodes of a TV show (our TV doesn't work so it's all DVDs for us) with my husband, have something delicious for dessert, then read or do something lazy until bed. I've been taking a lot of baths recently too due to front and back aches.

Well, today I thought to myself as work, "I should do some work on the nursery. I am 35 Weeks along after all. The nursery isn't going to finish itself!" I was surprisingly awake during the work day so I figured tonight would be a good time to knock out some of the to do's. Got home... and felt exhausted. But after dinner my energy picked up once again! Did some more organizing of the nursery. Hung some of the artwork. Discovered what items I need on my crafting shopping run tomorrow to hang the rest of the artwork. Discovered that I have no idea where our drill bits are... discouraging. So I wasn't able to do quite as much as I wanted. I did move all the rest of the baby things to the nursery instead of scattered around our bedroom though.

Tomorrow: I have to work a short event for a couple hours. Shouldn't be too bad. Then I want to clean our room (which mostly consists of putting away the laundry). I need to sell the rest of my textbooks online. That will get rid of a lot of clutter and then I'll be able to rearrange the guest room furniture. Then hopefully I'll be able to make a crafting run with Matthew so we can get all the tools needed to finish the nursery. The walls look so ugly since we're not able to paint. I will hang the rest of the stuff I already have then see if any more color is needed. We'll see what time it is. I may just relax the rest of the day.

Sunday: Church. Then hopefully finishing a bunch of work on the nursery. Putting together the pack n play station downstairs. Then... we should be pretty ready for baby!

The house needs a good cleaning, but that can always be done later. It's not top on my priority list but hopefully will get done before the baby comes. I want all the rooms and furniture moved to it's new permanent location first.

I feel accomplished enough for tonight. I wish I could find those drill bits though.

35 Weeks

Ah, yes. 35 Weeks. My belly has continued to grow. I didn't notice it so much until I saw my weekly picture! Definitely sticking out further than the 34 Weeks picture. Jackson is a growing boy. Which is good, but this probably means for an uncomfortable last 5 weeks!

The promised pictures from my Lynchburg baby shower. Below is the brunch set up. I loved the pictures frames and chalkboard that stated what each bunch item was. The food was so delicious!

The theme was once upon a time. The invites were so adorable! My friends are so crafty!

I had emailed the hostess some of my favorite pictures of Matthew and I as babies. I think Jackson will be a pretty cute baby! The wishing well on the top was for "well wishes" for me when I'm having a particularly stressful mommy day in the future!

We played jeopardy and baby scattergories. These are my fun presents! We got our bouncer seat, bumbo, boppy cover, some books, some hangers (much needed), some bath stuff, and from friends who couldn't make it to the shower: a gift card, a bath towel and outfits, a rattle and bottle brush, and breast milk storage bags and a formula dispenser. Good stuff!

My lovely friends who could attend the shower. The invites got send back in the mail twice, so unfortunately less than half the guest list could make it on such short notice. But it was still so much fun! Here we are making onesies and burp clothes!

Favors! Jack's Magic Beans! Adorable!

Now I'm beginning to feel ready for Jackson to arrive. While everything is not perfect in the house yet, I doubt it will be in the next 5 weeks anyways. There will always be more cleaning and organizing to do!

Preparation: This week I organized the nursery. Most of his things are put away. I still need to hang the wall art and his shelves. It's nice having things mostly organized though. If he were to come now, he would have a nice little home. I'm planning on him staying in our room for awhile in his sleeper anyways, so the crib shouldn't be used too much in the first few months! Speaking of the crib, we ordered and received the mattress. It's a good thing we measured the crib before ordering! Come to find out, our crib is not the "standard crib size" that most mattresses boast! I had a nice organic mattress I wanted but it was just a little too big. I found one that would fit and wouldn't you know, it was a Sealy Posturepedic! Our baby will be lounging in style! When Matt opened it up he was surprised and said, "This is such a fancy mattress!" We used amazon credit we had so it didn't matter that this mattress was slightly more expensive than the other options. We also had our last birthing class. I have begun formatting our birth plan to have all ready for when the time is right. Tonight I plan to pack my hospital bag and Jackson's diaper bag with his outfits and blanket. It's nice that I don't have to worry about bringing diapers and all that stuff that will normally be in the diaper bag. I don't anticipate going into labor anytime soon (soon, being relative of course), but want to be prepared either way! I moved all of his toys downstairs to their home in a storage box on the bottom of the bookshelves. I figure we'll bring some toys upstairs for him during the day, but for the most part his toys will live downstairs. Less distraction that way! Again, not that he'll use his toys much for the first little while, but it's nice to have them all in one central location.

Pregnancy symptoms: I don't know why some people dislike maternity clothes so much. I think the ones I have are super comfy and stylish! I guess it depends where you look. I have a mixture of actual maternity clothes (mostly Motherhood Maternity) and normal clothes that are a size up than my normal size. It's so nice that flowy and stretchy are in style right now! I have been getting more and more rundown each day. By the time I get home from work I am exhausted. On Thursday I was scheduled to go to a breastfeeding class. I skipped it in favor of a nap and a trip to Sweet Frog! Even though we paid for it, I don't feel that bad about skipping it. I'm sure the nurses at the hospital will help me with breastfeeding and I have some resources available if I have trouble. While I still have no stretch marks, the belly is growing. Since my belly pretty much sticks straight out, my lower abdominals often feel very stretched. When I change positions it often takes a couple seconds for the stretching feeling to ease. It is especially difficult changing positions when I am in bed or on the couch. And of course, bigger baby means more pressure on my bladder. Lots of running back and forth for me! Another preggo symptom I had avoided until now... the waddle. I mentioned several weeks ago that I thought I was waddling. I was way wrong. I have walked normally up until this point, slower than my average pace, but from the back you would never be able to tell I was walking funny. When we were at birthing class Matt mentioned that I "had my waddle on". Did he think that was a compliment? After that I noticed that I definitely have begun to waddle and I can't do anything about it. Maybe it's cute? I doubt it. Last week I mentioned my colostrum had come in. Let's just say it'll be good to go by the time baby arrives! May have to go find some nursing pads now!

Baby movements: Baby has been very busy every single day. He is getting ready to run around on the outside of mommy in just a few short weeks. He has the hiccups almost every day to prepare for breathing. He likes to twist and turn all day long- I think he'll be a pretty restless sleeper! He tries to kick out those legs but has discovered that he can only get a partial kick in now. It still hits in my ribs though, so not exactly comfortable. He is definitely head down as I can feel his little rump, knees, and feet along the top of my belly all day. Since I sit in a computer chair at work this makes me very uncomfortable. I try to stretch throughout the day, but I've just gotten used to the tightness and the whack whack whack as he moves. I am very thankful he is such an active baby, but I will be thankful when he can wiggle outside of me! One time this week it felt like he was sitting horizontally. I could feel movements on both of my sides and there was different pressure in the front and the back than normal. There are definite times I can tell he's sitting further back than normal as my back pain increases!

Pregnancy aides: I have discovered two pregnancy aides that should be recommended to all preggos! One, the heating pack. I had read that heating packs weren't advised during pregnancy. But in my birthing class it was recommended for labor. So I tried it on my aching back. Oh my goodness! Such relief! I usually heat it up a few times in the evening after work and put it on my lower back, then middle back, then shoulder area. After it has been loosened a little Matthew has been giving me massages to help ease the knots. My computer chair at work really is a back buster, so the combination of the heat and massage helps my muscles relax. I also discovered the joys of the exercise ball! I will most definitely be using a birthing ball when I am in labor. Matt and I were watching a movie and the couch was hurting my back. So he got out my exercise ball and I bounced on it. I don't understand why, but the pressure was immediately gone! I didn't feel like I had to keep myself upright as expected either. It was a very natural position and was so much more comfortable than sitting in a firm 90 degree position.

I was thinking of his birth date this week. While his due date is April 4, I know the likelihood of his being born on that day is not high. I was trying to think of what date might be interesting and easy to remember. For instance, my birthday is 8-7-87. My anniversary is 6-7-08. So... wouldn't it be fun if he was born on 4-8-12? Yes, that would mean he was late and I would probably be pretty miserable at that point... but it would be neat.

I am so excited to meet my little baby boy! While I still have 5 weeks until due date, I know those weeks will just fly by. I am so excited for that first labor contraction to begin and to count down until I will be holding him in my arms!

Exceptional Weekend

Even though it started out kind of rough, this weekend has been exceptional. Without going into too many details, we are now a one income family. Hopefully this won't last long and it actually isn't even that stressful... yet. Surprisingly enough, Matt and I have been at peace about everything and just looking forward to the next step in our journey. I am once again reminded of my focal verse for this year:

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. Do not quench the Spirit.

1 Thess. 5:16-19

While right now we are uncertain about our immediate future paths, we rest assured that God is in complete control and knows what's best for our lives. Living in confidence in Him is... very reassuring, to say the least. Thankfully, Matt and I have not been living outside of our means, are able to live comfortably on one income, and have enough in savings to give us some wiggle room when needed. Again, we still hope that this situation will be quickly remedied.

So, despite the rather rough start to the weekend... we were able to spend Friday night together, which we hadn't planned since Matt was originally scheduled to work that evening. He was also scheduled to work Saturday and Sunday mornings so I looked at it as extra time with my husband! We watched a movie, got some essentials from the store, and had a lovely evening in together.

Saturday morning I had a super fun shower with some of my Lynchburg friends. Unfortunately, the shower invites were returned in the mail twice... so many could not make it on such short notice. It was still so much fun to celebrate with my friends who could be there. The theme was "Once Upon a Time" and some of the decor included Jack's Magic Beans, a Wishing Well for wishes for me on stressful days post baby, and some old children's books. We played Baby Jeopardy (my team won!), Baby Scattergories, made onesies and burp clothes by designing bits of fabric- ironing them to the onesie or burp cloth- and the hostess will sew around the edges to keep them together (adorable!), and then opened presents. We also began with brunch, which was delicious! I am so blessed to have friends who know me so well. We got some items we still needed for Jackson, which is also a blessing. Pictures to come with this weeks preggo post.

After the shower Matt and I went to the gym. I have found that not only does it make me feel better about all the baby weight I've gained (which is actually not that much... but feels like a lot), but also it helps my legs and hips to loosen up. We then ran some errands and went to dinner at Panera with a gift card from Gma Lolo.

Today we went to church and were blessed by Pastor Nathan as usual. That is one thing I am not looking forward to once we enter the military- having to find new churches with each new assignment. I really enjoy Heritage Baptist, the preaching, and the heart of the church. We have been blessed to attend there the past 3.5 years. Came home, had some more good eats, took a nap, then did some organizing of the guest room and nursery. I was supposed to go to a baby shower for a friend this evening but I was so exhausted. I knew she would understand and I'll give her the present at work this week. I was able to get so much done in both rooms! I am so excited for the finished products. Thank you, nesting instinct! I haven't felt the need to wash everything yet... but I do have the organization bug! I have finally put away all of Jack's clothes... it's even worse than I thought! I'll have to keep track of what he wears to be sure we get at least one good wear out of all his outfits before he outgrows them!

It has been a very productive and relaxing weekend. I encourage you all to rest in the peace of the Lord in all situations. Normally I am a stressed person. I have been working on this and apparently I have gotten better. I have also been trying to grow in my active faith in the Lord. As I said before, it is very reassuring to live in the knowledge that God is in control.

34 Weeks

34 Weeks! Has it really just been 7 days since I was 33 Weeks? Time has started going S-L-O-W-L-Y! My boss the other day said, “When are you due?” I told him and he replied, “Man, that baby will never come out!” He is the father of 5 so is well aware how a pregnant woman feels at this point! While I know the next 6 weeks will go by more quickly than I anticipate (and I still have so much to do before he comes!)… the weeks seem to drag on and on. Up until this point time has flown by. Now I just can’t wait to meet my little guy on the outside!

The belly seems to grow every single day. I am much more uncomfortable now than I was even one week ago. Once I get settled in bed and fall asleep, I don’t think I move at all during the night. I don’t think I have much of a choice. My body is very exhausted and the belly is so heavy. It’s difficult to get comfortable to read or eat or… do pretty much anything. Since I have such a short torso there is zero space around the belly. It goes straight from hips to belly to breasts. Double uncomfortable. Baby has gotten used to kicking both my bladder and ribs. At least he’s a strong little guy!

Dreams: I have begun dreaming about birth, the baby, and life after baby. In one of my dreams my dad was holding Jackson in this hammock thing. He had to check his pager and wasn’t paying attention to Jackson. I watched in slow motion as Jackson fell off the hammock and onto the ground! As he was hitting the ground a layer of fluffy snow appeared so he was cushioned and not hurt at all. But I was one angry momma! In another dream, I was showing my friend, Kristin, all of Jackson’s things. We were going through his clothes and I noticed that I had a lot of dresses and girly clothes! I figured I would just put them away for our first baby girl… but then realized I only had about 10 boy outfits! That’s not good! In another dream, I was in the hospital (which doubled as the LUO call center) after birth. I woke up and my mom and sister were there holding Jackson. I held him and he was beautiful! Perfect! I was confused though, why was I waking up? Apparently my labor and delivery was so traumatic that I had blocked it from my memory. I had needed an epidural but that didn’t help much. As soon as the baby was delivered I passed out. Thankfully, he was completely healthy. As I held my baby I realized that the LUO office was being reorganized (what’s new) and we walked around seeing where all the departments would be. Matt had to go back to work so he was not there, which was sad.

Milestones: Colostrum is coming in. Getting ready for lots of feeding time to come! Horrible calf and foot cramps. I can generally stop them quickly after they begin… but sometimes it’s not convenient. When I’m working an event for instance. I plan to begin stretching my legs every day, maybe twice a day to help. Plus that should help come delivery time! My hips have also been aching more. My dad says they’re probably shifting to prepare for childbirth. I suppose that’s good news. Thankfully, since I’ve been stretching more so those pains have been lessening as well. My nesting instinct is also kicking in! This is good news since we need to finish reorganizing the guest room, the nursery, and clean the house before baby comes!

The baby has begun reacting to Matt and I! That is so exciting! He reacts/ squirms when Matt begins reading to him. Adorable. When I notice him kicking I push against his kicks and he pushes back! Sometimes I’ll push against the opposite side of my belly to see if I can get him to squirm. He happily obliges. I began singing to him and he began squirming right away. He is getting familiar with our voices and hopefully that will help calm him once he is here. I love forming bonds with our baby already!

Tuesday I drove down the NC for a quick overnight work trip. Twice that night I woke up afraid my water was beginning to break! Definite false alarms. I must have been dreaming about birth. Still, it was quite alarming! Possibly going into labor when I’m 4 hours away from home? Not ideal. I was trying to figure out if I should drive home or just get a cab to be safe. That poor cab driver!

Earlier this week I thought I would be excited to go back to work. I’m really hoping I can work part time in the office, part time at home. Working full time at home would be too good to be true! I began thinking of how nice it would be to continue to contribute to my family income, have a reason to look nice every day, and maintain my work relationships. I reserved the right to change my mind, however. Well… I am flip flopping! I just want to be able to stay home and coo at my baby love! We’ll see what happens over maternity leave and with the whole Army situation.

I have my last baby shower this Saturday. So excited to celebrate with my Lynchburg friends! Unfortunately, many of them had prior plans (or moved away recently), but I am so thankful for all my friends and Jackson’s future aunties. Sunday I will be attending a baby shower for one of my dear friends, Lauren. Babies, babies galore! She is 7 weeks behind me and due in late May.

Hopefully I will not be lazy this weekend and will get a lot accomplished in cleaning the house! Come next week, I’ll be content with baby coming at any time!

If you want to read previous pregnancy posts, click on "pregnancy" on the right side of the page. That will filter my posts to show only the preggo updates!