Sunday, January 17, 2010

Many Thoughts

This could be a very long post. I have been thinking about many things the past few days. So here are my thoughts.

I have begun to re-read the Baxter Family books by Karen Kingsbury. I'm not going to make the mistake I made in high school of reading them all back to back. They all have similar story lines (the same thing happening in different ways) so if you read them one right after another you can get sick of them. At least I did. Well, my sister accidentally sold my books while I was away at college, so I am also buying them back. I have three in the first series. That leaves two more and then there are two other series featuring this family as well. All of this to say, I am re-reading these and I have read the first one. They are quick reads and I like to read them between classics. A little modern day romance between war torn novels. Anyways, so one point that really made me think in this first book was the story of Jesus calming the storm. They're in a boat, right, and Jesus is sleeping. The storm is raging and the disciples get scared. They wake up Jesus and he simple says, "Peace! Be still!". Now, sometimes we are tempted to think that biblical characters acted foolishly. I mean, if I was in a boat literally with Jesus in the flesh, then even if He were sleeping I sure hope I wouldn't be cowering like a pansy. But wait a minute! When life seems to get all crazy and I'm frightened do I just sit back and trust that since Jesus is with me in my heart I have nothing to fear? I should, but I don't. You better believe I'm praying my heart out that the situation will be resolved quickly and in my favor. I'm waking up the Lord saying, "Hey! Where are you? Are you paying attention? Or are you sleeping?" I so often forget that all Christ need do is say, "Peace! Be still!" and everything will be calm. He is there with me every step of the way and even in the hard times, He is using those to stengthen and teach me. I had never really looked at that story in that light before. I always thougt about God's power to calm the seas, but never the fact that He simply is- all the time. (Mark 4:35-41)

Another book I read recently but never wrote about, Wuthering Heights. A book I thoroughly enjoyed reading, but I disliked every single character! I've never had that happen before. It was a good story, very well out together. But every single one of the characters, even the most minute, bothered me to no end! You would think this would render the book pointless to me, as so often happens. But no, I liked it. I'm glad I read it, and I'll probably read again sooner rather than later.

In my devos yesterday I was reading in James. I won't write the whole passage as that would make this post that much longer, but it was James 4:13-17 that specifically spoke to me. I have been saying that this May/June we'll be moving to a bigger dwelling. I've been saying that I hope to have our first child when I'm 24. I've been saying that we hope to move to Michigan when Matt's finished with his Masters. But truly, what is the point to this speech? The Lord alone knows the course he has for our lives. I can plan all I want but I also need to work on flexibility. We all know how disappointed I'll be if those things don't happen in my timeframes. That says a lot about me as a child of God. I am being stubborn. I need to learn to say, "If the Lord wills..." for He has the plan and the final say anyways.

I've also been reading The Five Love Languages. (yes, I've been reading an incredible number of books recently. I have chosen interesting books and that has helped them go quickly) I have never read this book since I know the languages already. But I own the book so thought I should read it. I knew that Matt was a words of affirmation and I was a quality time. No surprise there. What I discovered about myself though, is that even though I'm trying to be better about speaking Matt's language to him (which does not come naturally for me), I primarily speak acts of service! Odd, since most people speak their own language best. But I enjoy doing things for the people I love. I keep our house clean and try to manage our lives organized so that our home can be as stress free as possible for Matt. I do this because I love him. I give him haircuts, I buy things I know he needs or wants, and I try to think ahead for his needs so I can prepare for them. So I feel one way, do another, and need to do even another still! All a part of love. So many languages, so many dialects. I am learning.

Tax time is coming. I received one W2 in the mail. Thankfully, our taxes should be pretty simple this year. Once they start getting complicated I'll probably just hire someone to do it. A little money out but worth not having the headache. I don't like taxes. But we should be getting a nice refund since I always have too much taken out of my pay just in case. I know, it's silly.

Time for bed I think. I start work at noon tomorrow. Starting in February we will have four shifts instead of three and I'm not scheduled for a single late shift! It's amazing.

Happy third week of January!

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