Something very profound that I feel like I'm beginning to understand more and more with the experience of each and every day. Simple. Truth. Fact.
And there's nothing you can do about it either way. It just... happens. And you continue on. That's how it is. That's how it always will be. It happens.
Don't read too far into that. It sounds pessimistic, but it really isn't. Sure, some days are a little rough. Some days you just want to dig a deep deep hole, crawl into it, and never come out again. But some days when life simply happens, the world is bright, loving, and wonderful. All things are new and good and pure. And you have a smile on your face no matter how slowly people drive, how many people are frustrated at you for something that was there fault to begin with (the story of my work life), or how many times you have to go to the bathroom throughout the day.
You can tell what has been bothering me the past few days.
Life simply happens. It will keep going. Move along, now.
I received our Christmas photos back from my good friend, Danielle. She has her own photography business that she's been building for about a year now. I was very pleased with the pictures. They capture the essence of Matthew and I. I mean, we don't look like models, we don't look like we're trying to hard or smiling to big, but we're extremely genuine. It helps having a friend take the pictures. So we're not so stiff to begin with. But for the first time, I noticed my true smile, the way my face looks when I'm laughing. And I actually liked it! Usually I hate pictures where I'm not doing my posed smile because I think it makes my eyes to squinty and my cheeks too chubby. But I loved these. She did a fantastic job!
Speaking of my husband. I don't give him enough credit. People often think we're pretty neutral about each other. Which is extremely sad if you think about it. But my husband is such a strong, loving man. I am so blessed to have him by my side each and every day.
I was trying to think of how to describe exactly what Matt is to me and I kept coming up with illustrations from the Bible. He is my cornerstone, my rock, my stronghold, my home, my love, my only. And isn't that the way it's supposed to be? He has not nearly taken the place of the Lord in my life, but he has taken the lead in our life in such a way that I am sure of him.
I'll try to formulate better examples when I'm not so tired. I have been staying up later than I should because I haven't been able to fall asleep until late. It stinks actually. I should have gone to bed at 9:45 because I work the first shift in the morning which starts at 7:45. This is the first time since my training weeks that I've needed to be in to work that early. I'll be making coffee in the morning! Usually I go to work at 8:45 with one or two shifts a week where I start at 12. Tomorrow is going to hurt... but then I'll get out earlier and have the whole afternoon to do some Christmas shopping... maybe. I was going to do that today but it was too cold to do anything but come straight home, settle into some sweats, and heat up some soup!
Anyways, all that to say, I'm tired. Good night.