Election Day is tomorrow. I am excited for it to be over because I hate elections. But I also dread the results. Maybe a miracle will happen. We'll just wait and see. Either way, I'm not going to complain too much with the outcome. I promise. We'll just have to make the most of it.

We had a teacher work day at St. John's this morning. We had a workshop to take care of a few of our required 16 training hours we must attend throughout the year. A much well used work day, I think. Most schools have tomorrow off to in lieu of the election. I think we should as well. But nope. Gotta wake up early and go play with the kiddies. Ah well. At least they're sweet.

I'm having some more difficulty with the bank. I deposited 500$ and that shows up on my itemized statement. But then the overall balance of my account only added about 100$ to the previous total. My whole deposit was in cash so it doesn't make much sense. I'll give it to tomorrow to clear up but if not then the bank and I are going to have some serious words. I have bills to pay and I need that money. It's all very nerve racking and aggravating for me. I know I should just "chill" and let it be, but I just hate dealing with the bank. I've never had trouble with banks before this. Maybe I need to switch to a different bank. Ah well.

I need an attitude adjustment I think. I keep thinking things will be better when... but that's not necessarily true. Every stage of life will have it's highs and lows. I can't keep waiting for "then" to get here. When we have a house we'll have more payments than ever to make. Things will constantly need fixing or repairing or replacing. We'll have a mortgage which won't be much fun. We'll be responsible for everything since we'll be homeowners. And yet, I keep thinking life will somehow be so much easier and simpler then. Nope. I'm wrong, I just know it. And I think it will be better when we're making more money. But more money means more everything else as well. And we still have grad school to think about and all those expenses. And the expenses of starting a family. So even when we start making more money it will probably still feel similar to now when we're crunched for money. And we're doing extremely well for newlyweds when it comes to finances. I think it will be so much better when I stop working and have a baby... but I'll be more tired and probably more cranky then overall. Not a very pleasant thought in reality. So I need an attitude adjustment. I need to stop thinking about "someday" and just focus on the good of today. I'm going to start writing down the good of each day in my journal. I'll whine as well, that's what a good journal is for really. But I'll also make sure to write down the good of each day. Even if it's just something simple and small, like how i noticed how beautiful the red leaves on the ground were this morning when I went in to work. They were a truly unique shade of red and it was beautiful. That made me smile. I also felt very well rested this morning when my alarm went off. That is always better than having to drag myself out of bed. I also want to try to learn something new each day and write it in a small notebook. That way when I feel a little down I can read through my new notes of wisdom and feel better. I love to learn. I learn so much without even really thinking about it. Working with kids has been teaching me a lot too. They say the funniest things, but also some things that are very true but only the eyes of a child would notice it. I can't think of any examples right now, but I will.

Basically, November is going to be a month of change for me. I'm going to do the things listed above. I'm going to eat healthier- I have discovered a few new fruits and vegetables I enjoy now as opposed to my childhood hatred of most varieties. I am going to work out everyday, even if it's something small. Each day has a different schedule so I may not have time to do a regular full workout, but something to keep me moving. I have been stretching lately like I used to and it has helped my posture and my "limberness" for lack of a better word. I feel so much better already. I have a new devotional plan I'm following, which has been enjoyable so far. And I want to start saving away some of our money in our actual savings account instead of just keeping it all in checking for "later". So many changes and all for the better. No more laziness for Becca. Nope.

I feel like I'm finally beginning to "grow up". I've been transitioning for the past few years during college of course, but I still was a spoiled little brat at heart. I'm still pretty childish about a lot of things, but I'm attempting to grow up an out of bad habits. It's time to become the woman of the house. The woman of the house needs to be responsible for herself and her husband. The woman of the house needs to stay on top of things and figure out her own problems instead of running to mommy or daddy about them. That's been something I've done a lot since marriage. When I have a question about a "real life issue" I call home for answers. It always seemed to me that my parents knew everything. I wonder how well I'll be able to help my children with their homework or their questions about life someday. There's so much I have no idea about. Hopefully I'll grow in wisdom before then. I'm trying.

I like growing up and life. Sure it's scary sometimes and super aggravating at others. But for the most part I enjoy learning and becoming a better person with each day. God made me just as He wanted me. I may not understand why I am the way I am, but He does and He loves me for it. I have to remember that when I get discontent. That's really the hard truth of it all. I need to learn to be content. Everything else will just flow. Trust in the Lord ALWAYS.

The end.