It's so different not having to turn my computer on each morning in preparation for the rest of the day. For the past three years I have awoken from my cell phone alarm, climbed out of my bed in my dorm room, turned on my computer and entered all the necessary passwords while changing into my robe and getting my shower shoes (communal showers... ick), taken my shower, and had everything ready when I was on my way to class. I used my computer every day for notes, paper writing, finding needed facts off google or wikipedia, watching movies to tune out my roommates at times, and of course- checking facebook. Now I turn it on when I have a large abundance of time, need to do some picture editing, or don't want to bother with the spell check on my Blackberry. My poor little notebook feels ill used. But I turned it on this morning. And I am glad I did. I have missed my little computer. The perfect size for little me. My dad picked it out by himself for my graduation from high school present. I was a little nervous when I tore off the wrapping paper and saw the HP box. I didn't know if he would pick out the perfect computer for me. I knew he would pick out one that worked well and had all the necessary programs for me. But I was so impressed. It is perfect for me. And three and a half years later it's still working strong. Sure, I would like a macbook because now that I don't have school work to do it would be amazing for my photography and other artsy needs, but this little notebook is pretty amazing. I am so blessed.
I had a good long cry last night. A bunch of mixed emotions suddenly hit me and I was exhausted from working all week while being sick. I was far from home, missed my family, missed my Grand Rapids friends, missed my Liberty friends since the drive over to LU uses up the same amount of gas as driving to and from work does in a week, and missing my husband who was at work until midnight last night. I called my mom and sobbed for awhile. Then I sat in my room, not reading, not watching a movie, not listening to any music, just sitting and crying. Then I got over myself and wrote a list of things I am thankful for in my journal. That was all I needed. I have been so blessed. Of course there will be ruts to conquer in this life. And right now I have quite a few new ruts to maneuver around. I just have to buck up, put a smile on, count my blessings, and keep moving forward. So that is what I am doing- moving forward. The bad part about a pity party is the cleaning up afterward. The tissues that piled up on the side of my bed, the messed up hair and makeup to wash, and the puffy and red eyes that made it difficult to read. Yes, it was quite the night last night. Finally my amazing husband came home and we had a great night together.
I finished the book I had been reading in anticipation for the new books my husband bought me: The Perks of Being a Wallflower and The Lovely Bones. Yes, they are books several of us read in high school, but I did not. I was busy reading old Literature trying to become well read and missing all the new publications that came out. So I figured it was time to remedy this. I started The Perks of Being a Wallflower last night. I got about halfway through it before Matt wanted to go to bed. I finished it this afternoon. I liked it... but don't recommend it for everyone. Like my Liberty friends. I definitely don't recommend it for you girls due to the content and the references that I wouldn't want to taint you. Just trust me. But for the rest of the world out there, it's a great read about high school life. I think it's kind of an every person's book. It tells a little about every one. It's our story. Sure, I definitely did not suffer most of the unfortunate situations mentioned in Charlie's letters, but I could relate in different ways. It made me extremely sad for the world. We live in a world where horrible things happen. ANd that is life. But it still ends on a happy note, in a weird twisted way. There is still hope. Which is a very comforting thought.
I have begun The Lovely Bones. I have heard great reports of this book. So far, so good. It still makes me sad the pretense of the book being as it is. But I'm enjoying it all the same.
Go have a good read.