Today I appear particularly large. I still fit nicely into all of my clothes so I haven't gained too much weight... but I am at the peak weight of my life. Yeah, I'm not too thrilled about that. It was so nice when I was always on a sports team in high school. I got a good workout pretty much everyday without thinking about it. Now I have to schedule in workouts and make myself do the routines. I refuse to gain any more weight. In fact, I believe I will begin to diet. And I am now motivated to workout more than I have. I'll at least do something small everyday if I don't have time for a complete workout. I hate growing older and gaining weight. Even if it is only a couple pounds.

I am a girl, what did you expect? Every girl complains about her weight sometimes.

I feel out of the loop of life. I need a job desperately. I am fast running out of things to do at home. My friends have been real busy lately getting geared up for the new school year. I definitely feel out of the loop there. My friends back home all have random craziness occupying their time. And who knows when I'll get to see them next anyways? My family has all been super busy with camping and setting up my parents new home. Matthew is gone a lot with work, not as much as he could be, but still a lot. And I am sitting here twiddling my thumbs, reading a lot of books, and cleaning a house that is already mostly clean. I feel out of the loop.

The Graduate Assistant position isn't going to work out. The tuition reimbursement is only for 18 credit hours. My program is 30 and I don't want to hassle with trying to switch jobs later. I should hear something back from other departments around Liberty soon though. I'm remaining hopeful.

Today is just one of those days. A bit gloomy outside, a bit gloomy inside.

But hey, tomorrow is my 21st birthday! That should liven up the moods!

Waiting,
Rebecca Iveson