It's the same old story. I sent in an application with another five jobs today. Maybe something will come of it. Maybe not. In reading Jane Austen, I have to wonder what people did back then for money? You have your doctors and clergymen and servants, cooks, etc. There are of course, the army, politicians, and people of that sort. But what of the every day people? She talks of allowances and earnings but her characters hardly seem to do anything. They tend their our estates, but where does the money come from? They had dowries and inheritances, but surely one cannot live on this alone? I admit, I am very ignorant of history and life in general in these instances. I know there were Dukes and Lords and all those fine people, but did they honestly just inherit, buy, or earn their title and then lay about at home- going to the occasional ball or social engagement? And when a woman's husband passed, then what? Where did her yearly allowance come from? Was insurance really so great as to provide for her lifetime? It all seems rather... wanting. Confusing to me who lives where all people work in some capacity. Part of me longs for that time, but the inconveniences far outweigh the romantical. But if I could have a yearly allowance as well as Matthew's... that would be a fine living apart from working. I would much rather that. But then we'd have to have good connections or family to do so, I suppose. I told Matthew he should do something heroic in Britain to warrant knighthood. Then he would indeed be Sir Matthew (my old nickname for him when we first started dating) and I would be Lady Iveson. I rather like the sounds of that.
I have tried writing again, and it also is the same old story. Lots of details in between, but so much lacking in getting there. I write sequences that I intend to pull together somehow, but can't seem to make everything come together happily. And endings were never my strong point. Maybe someday something will come of all this. I thought of writing all the bits that come into my imaginations down and then creating a story about a writer who has my problem and filling the book with those bits of stories. Leaves a lot for the readers' imagination. But those kinds of books always bother me and leave me questioning. I'm not satisfied being able to come up with my own ending. I want to know what the true ending is, or would have been. So I would not dare do that to readers. Someday maybe it will happen.
It is my sister's birthday this weekend. I have her card all ready to be dropped in the mail. I had better not forget tomorrow or it will be too late. One of Matt's friends is getting married this weekend also. It will be a beautiful wedding, I'm sure. I'm so disappointed we cannot make it. The wedding is in Ohio, we would have to spend the night, Matt would have to take off work for a couple days, and we'd be tired from driving and both have to work full schedule next week. It just wouldn't work out plus I doubt he would've been able to get the time off. Bother adulthood and jobs and being responsible.
Enough for now. Until...
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