Good Night, Moon

Life.

Ups and downs. Downs and ups. And not always so fun.

But it's finally starting to look up!

The car got fixed today. Yes. I got rear-ended by a Lynchburg driver. I'm really satisfied with the paint job... but there's still two small dents in the back. But they're hardly noticeable. I don't mind them if I keep the Jeep, but if I sell it (as I really hope I can convince my parents) then it will decrease the value. Ah well. It will look pretty for me at least. It's much better now than before. I'm glad that got taken car of . And it only took them 3 hours to fix since the guy who hit me worked at a dealership. Nice.

The bridesmaid dresses came on Tuesday. And they're official. We're keeping them. They look marvelous on all three girls and I LOVE LOVE LOVE the design. I'm so glad I found them instead of going with bold green or blue. The red is so much better and what I've always wanted. And the gold design with go excellently with all my gold accents. And the invitations I found are gold so that solidifies my desire for those invites!

My new coach purse also came on Tuesday. I am so glad I bought it. I was a little skeptical at first, but from the moment I opened the package I was pleased! It is exactly what I wanted. My friend has this purse style and I haven't been able to find it in any stores. So when I did find it I jumped on it quick. I had envied my friend's purse for years so now I have one of my own!

I think I found a quartet for my wedding also! I had contacted this girl I know who is in a really good quartet back home. She hadn't gotten back to me for awhile so I had pretty much given up hope. But tonight... there was the message! So I'm getting more details and hopefully setting everything up with them soon. I am so excited. Their price is perfect and their music selection works wonderfully. I am so happy I thought of them! One of the girl's is my old friend from junior high. She is such a blessing! I was stressing a little over the music... but now it's finally taken care of!

Matt and I had a long and good talk today. I have been having some trouble adjusting to this year. I felt like I was back in 10th grade. If you knew me in 10th grade, you'll understand. That was very possibly the worst year of my life. A lot of crap happened that year and I was only 15, so I didn't handle it well. It was definitely the year I decided it was time to grow up. Now, I'm not saying I grew up then. I just knew it was time to stop being a child and start becoming a young woman. Anyways, Matt and I talked about this year. I was a little stubborn at first because I felt like he was just analyzing me and treating me like one of his patients. (He's a counselor on the psych ward at the hospital you see) But after awhile I opened up and let him know exactly how I was feeling and why I was so sad and lonely. It had some to do with him, but a lot to do with other things. Life has just been extra hard this semester. Classes are going good. My internship is amazing. I don't like work, but it's not bad at all and my hours have been very good. It's just a lot of emotional and personal things that have been weighing me down. But I'm slowly learning how to deal with it.

I also realized that I'll never go back home and it will be my "home". I'll go back to visit for Thanksgiving and Christmas Breaks. Then I'll be home for the month in between graduation and the wedding, but that will be so busy I won't have time to stop and embrace my home. And then I'll be packing up all my things and moving to Virginia... semi-permanently. At least for a few years. It just hit me suddenly last night. I called my mom and cried about it for awhile. I'm completely ready to be married and I cannot wait to move in to Matt and my apartment and start next year. And I don't even really want to go back home for good. I'd move out regardless of if I were single, working, or going to grad school back home. I would still get my own place because I don't like it when kids move back in after college. But home is like a safety net. I haven't completely left the nest yet. But it's time.

I'm feeling better now. Talking with Matt really helped. I am so thankful for him. He really is my very best friend. And I don't know what I would do without him. I'd probably be in my junior year of college, pursuing the wrong degree, and becoming a little bit more like the world than I should. So yes, I'd be a mess without him pretty much.

Only 8 more months until I'm done with undergrad! Then 1 more month after that until I'm no longer Rebecca Eileen Bonnell.

Then grad school begins for me. Granted everything goes well. I have decided to pursue a Masters in Human Services: Counseling. I'll be working on that while Matt is still working at the hospital. We'll stay here for a year and then after I'm done (it's a one year program), we'll move to whatever Medical School Matt decides to attend and begin his schooling. I'll be working full time hopefully in an agency and he'll be taking care of business!

All in all, a wonderful first couple of years. I'm pretty excited.

Good night, Moon. I hope you shine brightly tonight!